The dangers of Nm

I have you ever wondered, how you started off doing something with the best of intentions and to better another’s life and continued that way but along the line you misunderstood the dynamics of A relationship and shared something with someone about that person in a jokey way because in your mind they were so close that the other obviously knew!

Doh!!

And although in your mind it was so minor that you thought a simple apology would do because if the shoes were reversed you would have taken it with a pinch of salt and thought , oh that’s okay, no big deal! (A fantastic example of how we as humans have different references point)

But instead of the expected reaction, this person is and has kept a grudge!! An almighty one to that extent that you don’t even get a SALAM anymore, and wait for it not even if I initiate it!! I mean come on for the love of God what must a person do (i.e. try to run over your mum) for you not to respond to their salam! (These things just don’t happen in my world)

And to make it just that bit more interesting they are convinced that you betrayed their trust! That you’re a core of evil and given the opportunity you would corrupt all because your so well versed in the art of manipulation that you have managed to deceive everyone into thinking that your some innocent and genuinely nice person, however because they have seen through your deceptive ways they are now immune and can see you for the evil, scheming, deceptive woman that you are! (The brother obviously has gender issues!)

Sounds like a bad novel in the making eh! I am not sure whether to smile at the comical value or be concerned by it! I think Sarah is right I really do live in a bubble; this is going to turn into one of those

“I haven’t spoken to so and so for about 10 years situations!” (Why is it always 10 years anyway?). I think that’s simply strange, what ever happened to 70 excuses?! It’s so sad

And so for the first time in my life someone thinks am a core of evil and should come with a label, I can’t be trusted, I have devious and menpulative ways of getting what I want…yada…yada !

I have got over trying to understand him though, sometime you just have to accept that people have different ways of seeing the same situation even if by your standards it would seem extreme and in someways rather worrying! I have even wondered if its an ethnicity thing! which make me feel uncomfortable because then am questions my core belive that we are all the same and culture isn't such a big deal!

I have deliberately put this person on my Du’a list because I remember once Sheikh Salem telling us that if you have bad thoughts about a brother or sister you should make dua for them because it protects you! Well since I would love to grab his head and stick it in the toilet and flush the toilet while his head is in it several times till he apologises I think he deserves a place in my dua’s.

May Allah enable us to all see the best in each other and truly become brothers and sisters Ameen